Go LAY Somewhere Else

Set the scene: 
I'm in a small theater for a screening and a woman comes in, takes the seat next to me, and whips out a bag of potato chips. The theater goes dark. She futzes around with the bag, yanking it until it opens. (Wait ... there's more.) When her fight with the bag is finally over, she "delicately" eats each potato chip. One. By. One. The sound of her chewing was unbearable. I felt like SCREAMING, "If you're going to eat that crap, go outside the theater where you don't have to be quiet." (But I didn't.)